Take That to the Bank… Or at Least Open Your Account to Us, Mr. President.

“The Reptile”

 

President Barack Obama is a joke. To put it in terms that the younger generation would understand, President Obama’s second term closely parallels the lyrics to Lupe Fiasco’s [B-rated] hit “Kick Push.” Obama kicked through the competition, pushed his way into the presidency and is now coasting through his presidential term. I have to admit, President Obama is a lot like myself. He was an attorney after all, so most of his controversial statements lately are on-point to his previous educational experiences. Albeit I would assume the President did not relish in so many vacations back then, but law school was definitely a win-win for the President’s public speaking agenda. I believe a few examples are necessary in order to understand what I mean. “Kick it!” (sorry, I had to continue with the music theme.. plus, I really like the Beastie Boys).

“Three Sides to A(n Attorney) Story”

 

(1) The Uncompromiser

 

My days in law school were filled with definite answers. These answers were based on a rule of law or case law that was directly on point to the educational topic at hand. Just like law school, a presidential campaign is filled with definite answers to questions that are predetermined. It is obvious what questions are going to be asked and how each candidate (Democrat or Republican) will answer those questions. The difference lies in the manner and tone as to which the candidate answers. If you sound confident in your answer, the general public will believe you. Case in point: the “Change” campaign by President Obama. The campaign in and of itself was brilliant. Who doesn’t want change? And who didn’t want change back then? Change sounded wonderful, as did President Obama’s pledge to remove troops within 16 months of taking the presidential office.  Removing troops during a time of war and bringing them back to a land of peace. This statement was uncompromising, unbending, and (dare I say it?) unyielding.

 

(2) The Backtracker

 

Although definite answers in law school were great, some answers were not good enough… or were they? Law school professors are to students as the media is to the President. Law school professors always try to trip up students into choosing the wrong answer when they were correct in the beginning – or at least allowing for an uncompromising answer to sound a little more compromising. One professor comes to mind – Professor Matt Reiber at Florida Coastal School of Law. He is an extremely educated and talented professor that knows how to twist your mind into a Rubik’s cube (then twist it back again in an ever-so swift fashion). In an essence, he wanted you to think of every scenario no matter if it was different from the answer you provided in the beginning. He made you think (much as I want my readers to do). Either way, the media is like this for the President. At this point, the President is being kept in check by the media (eh, go with me here). Because the media is finally catching him on every lie, it has to publish something whether it wants to do so or not. In this case, let’s continue with the removal of troops situation. According to President Obama as of the latest he did not want to pull the troops out of Iraq. Let me repeat: the guy who wanted the troops removed from Iraq during his presidential campaign now states he had nothing to do with pulling the troops out of Iraq.  This was apparently not his decision. So… whose decision was it exactly? Maybe the President took a lesson from his law school professors, or maybe he failed to understand that backtracking only leads you to look like a fool in front of your peers.

 

(3) The Concealer

 

Masking things that occur was a highlight of my law school career. After all of the definitiveness and backtracking, you just want to cover up your mistakes (or your correct answers that after backtracking ended up as mistakes) and run and hide.  I would normally retreat to my apartment, drown myself in a bottle of Lucky Duck wine and watch a few episodes of Gossip Girl.  However, if I could have afforded it, I would have concealed my mishaps like our dear President. Running around Martha’s Vineyard or playing golf (barf!) on a beach in Hawaii sound like great ways to not only make myself feel better but also conceal every pain I had of being called on in a law school class.  President Obama seems to take vacations at the most inopportune times – most recently during the ISIS terrorist situation. If you have been living under a rock and haven’t heard of this, you have some reading to do. There is nothing like a good “terrorists behead U.S. journalist on videotape” story to get your blood boiling. That doesn’t working for you? How about the headline “terrorists beheading Christian mothers and children?” Yeah, now I have your attention. Either way, concealment of the fact that the President took troops out of Iraq (or did he?) only to watch his plan blow up in smoke has landed the President in hot water. Time to go take a cold bath filled with regret, Mr. President.

“Closing Time”

I know I haven’t written in awhile… I have been pretty busy with work. However, this article is not the end. This article is just the precursor to my next article all about the endearing presidential hopeful, Hillary Clinton.  If you thought my previous articles were bad, you will want to mark your calendars for the next one. Remember friends – do your research and read The Constitution.

Drop the mic.

 

Song References: “Take That To The Bank” – Shalamar; “The Reptile” – The Church; “Fight for Your Right (To Party)” – Beastie Boys; “The Sides to a Story” – Joe Budden; “Closing Time” – Semisonic.

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